Wednesday, February 24, 2010

OMGz ( Oh my german zombies): Dead Snow review

Okay. Dead snow was the single bast foreign zombie movie I have ever seen. Dead snow might have been the single best foreign film I've ever seen. That was so incredible.

Okay, so, this movie I heard about in Fangoria back in mid 2009. I could not wait. This and Zombieland were like the only two zombie movies I was looking forward before I started this list. And I was right on both counts.

Plot: A group of med students are going on vacation to a cabin, they're going to have like, a ski weekend. The one who owns the cabin is going to meet them there. They get there and are there for about a day when a creepy old guy barges in and demands free coffee. So they give it to him and after declaring how bad it is tells them that back in WWII there were this group of Nazi's that got away from an angry mob that had been mistreated. The evil from those Nazi's had manifested by the cabin and to be careful. Then he leaves. Then it's another hour of Zombie Nazi fun.

There was one character I really like SPOILER: He dies. Then fat one dies. But he is this huge movie nerd and I'll come to why I like him in just a minute.

Now, if you plan on watching this movie and would like to be surprised, then don't read this but for those of you who have no intentions of watching it, I put together a top 5 moments for you, and a few honorable mentions. They go in order they appear in the movie, not in order of how much I like them..

1. As the people are walking up to the cabin they begin to make fun of how many bad horror movies start with a group of students out by themselves in a cabin in the middle of nowhere ( topic brought up by the movie nerd, oh yeah )

2. The homage to the rules from Scream (for those of you that haven't seen it, it's a total classic, a must see, but I'll fill you in. No sex, no drugs, no saying "I'll be back." ) The movie nerd says " I'll be back." And true to the rules of a good horror film, he dies. Also, he has sex, and the girl he did it with also dies.

3. The moment when a character has an epic "throwing the Molotov cocktail at the zombies scene." He misses the window, catches the cabin on fire.

4. One of the med students get's bitten and sews the gaping flesh of his neck back together, without looking. After doing this, he applies duct tape to the wound. That had to hurt. I'm glad we didn't see him have to take that off....

5. The theory that because these zombies happen to be Nazis that if they bite you and you're part Jewish, you can't become one of them because they won't want you.

~Honorable Mentions~

~Where the one girl breaks the port-a-potty and falls right in to a pit of fecal matter.

~ Where a guy stabs a zombie through the head and guts rain down on the guy trapped beneath him

~A guy uses a frozen arm he finds in the snow to defend himself against a zombie. He throws it and upon impact it shatters.

~ A guys get's tied to a tree with his own intestines.

And finally ~ A guys gets bit, realizes it could turn him into a zombie, takes a chainsaw, amputates his own arm, cauterizes it, and takes one step forward to be bitten on the leg from a zombie who comes from the ground, sort of like the shark in jaws, but from the snow instead of water.


Okay, I would definitely recommend this movie to anyone.... unless you get sick really, really, really easily. It was epic!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I give it five brains ( out of five)


See you next time for a movie that probably won't be as good,
Cat.

OMZ!!!!!!! ( oh my zombie )

Cold Snow is available for free on Netflix. I have been dying to see this forever and now I'm going to go watch it. This will be the first zombie Nazi movie that get's crossed off the list. WIsh me luck everybody!!!!

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Okay

I did not get to watch a zombie movie today, which is not to say I didn't get any work done on the list. I put every zombie movie netflix has to offer in the queue and I also made an instant queue for my freebies. Soon, after I have done a little more research I'll post list of zombie movies that I need help finding. But in the meantimes, stay tuned for more exciting zombie news.

Revelation

I'm sorry. I realize I haven't posted a new blog in a while. I was doing a little zombie soul searching if you will.

Recently I watched the worst movie of my life and I was willing to do so for this list, I'm sure you remember reading my review for it ( skeleton key 2 ) Then I found out, it wasn't even on my list. At first I was outraged, then devestated, and then I thought about asking my sponsors if I could cross a movie off the list in it's place. Then I thought about just giving up.

So I dug out my very official contract ( a note I wrote with a bic pen on the first oage of my planner and then signed and it said..... " By the end of this year, ( February 1st, 2011 ) I will have watched all 371 zombie movies." I got the number 317 from Abe, who had printed out a list from wikipedia.

Here's the thing, I signed on to watch all the movies from that list, all 371 of them, in order to get the zombie trophy and the zombie movie hunters badge. But by the time I printed out my own copy of the list, there were over 500 movies. I realized that there are even more out there, and that to get my trophy all I needed to do was copy out Abe's list. That would cut off about 200 movies. I was going to ask to borrow that list when I got back into school this monday, I have always been a procrastinator and an under achiever, why do more than I really have to.

So my plan, was going to be to go in and ask for that list, but then I realized something. When I printed out that list, i knew there more movies then what Abe had had. I could see that. But I did it anyway. This isn't about a zombie trophy or a badge, this is about seeing every zombie movie ever made by the end of this year. So, there's a chance I might not make it, I'll be half surprised if I do, there's a chance that by the end of the year, all my sponsors will have forgotten and I won't get a damn thing. But it was never about that to begin with. It's a journey of self discovery and zombies. This is for me. And you, faithful readers. So, I'm going to do all the movies on my list, Abe's list, the short film section, all the gray area zombies and when I find zombie movies that weren't on either list, you'd better be damn sure I'm going to watch them
anyway and write a review on this blog. Because this isn't about rewards, it's about my year among the undead.

So, in conclusion instead of going to winter formal, I stayed home and watched Let's Scare Jessica To Death. And for me, that's more worthy to blog about anyway.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Review: Warriors of Terra

This movie had little to do with zombies. Really it had little to do with anything. It was terrible. I would tell you a little about the plot, but I'm actually kind of confused by it. So instead I'm going to give you extra pictures from it instead Sound like a deal? Here you go.


It's safe to say I don't recommend it.

I was planning on watching a zombie nurse in love today, what with the depressing holiday, I mean, after all, there is only one valentines day in my zombie year. But instead I'm going to do a rewatch. My parents haven't seen zombieland yet and I got it for Valentines day so, I'll try to get a second movie in today though, Zombie nurse in love hasn't come in yet, so I'll probably just do a freebie.

Let you know how it goes though.

Love, ( eat my flesh )
Cat

Friday, February 12, 2010

What I would look like as a zombie

Netflix is being slow so in the meantime..... this is what I would look like if I were a zombie. Sorry about the lag time, blame netflix not me.

Kentucky Fried Zombie Blog


Look at this icon I found!!!!!

Well I'm about to watch some zombie movies, I'm thinking like dead gangs or undead or alive. Hang on for pics of the Zombie movie hunter badge. Thought though you would enjoy this icon.

I found a bunch of movies that aren't even on the list, a lot of which I've seen so I'll probably be posting yet another edited list soon. But anyway.....

I also am reading more zombie fiction. It's really affecting my life... a lot.

Anyway.... I'll be back on later with some movie reviews.

Undead,
Cat

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Movie Review: Skeleton Key 2

This quickly in my search I have found the worst movie in the world. I am not ashamed to say this. And i have seen some pretty terrible movies too. Skeleton Key 2 was worse than Twilight, Dumpster Baby, Planet of the Apes, and Tideland. I mean it, it was really terrible. That is going to be the hardest movie to watch, and I already have it out of the way.

So, where do I start, describing this 2 hours of torture? Well, let's start with the plot. There was none. Special effects? Red paint? The costumes? Actually, some of the costumes were pretty decent. Of course, you know, they had a pirate in the movie for no reason, I think mostly because they had a pirate costume and were like " yeah, let's throw that in there." There were a lot of sex scenes, and I found myself wondering if this was a zombie movie or a low quality porno. Answer? It was both, but not with very many zombies. The zombies, btw, were just regular people with blue paint on their face.

Also there were like, 6, random song interludes, none of them had anything to do with anything. One was a parody of puttin'' on the ritz about taking a shit.

Pleas, for the love of all that is unholy, do not ever, ever, ever think it is a good idea to watch this movie. Don't ever think it's a bad idea and watch it anyway.

I repeat: DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE

Now, I could give you a spoiler to this movie, but they do that in the movie. About halfway through a man in a tux comes on and tells you how it ends. So instead, I will tell you the only good things about this movie, there are three.

1. The subtitle: 667, neighbor of the beast
2. The part where the man gets a VHS message in the mail and says " I can't play this" then immediately is greeted by the same thing on DVD
3. It ended, eventually..

Sorry, I don't have a picture of this one for you, I'm not on my home computer right now. You wouldn't want to see it anyway.

Here are some things that made Twilight better than this movie.

Twilight was about half an hour shorter
Twilight still had bad special effects, but there were less of them
There were no random musical parodies
The sound track was better
There is a drinking game for Twilight
An ex Grey's anatomy character was in Twilight
You know the actors and can make fun of them easier
Bella gets run over by a car
There were no cowboy hats ( at least not that many of them )
The sex scenes weren't as graphic.
It was easier to pretend there was a plot
There were no vampires in twilight. ( yes, skeleton key 2 had better vampires )
You could understand the things you wish you weren't hearing in twilight.
There were no toilet jokes in twilight.
There was no robot in twilight that was a very very poor plot decision and is only there for the last 10 minutes of the movie. ( credits included in this time)


So, please. DOn't watch this movie.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Movie Review: Oh! My zombie mermaid.

Yes, it finally came. Oh! My zombie mermaid is finally here. And I watched it. It was the single most amazing zombie mermaid film, that I have ever been lucky enough to witness. There was some ridiculous zombie mermaidness.

Truth be told it was less like a zombie movie and more like..... A kung fu movie. I think it was supposed to be like 25% zombie, 25% mermaid and 50% wrestling. They pretty much ended up with a mermaid and a zombie tied in poorly to a kung fu movie. Still though, it was pretty amazing. And it counted for the list which is what matters most, this list comes before all else. This is my new life.

Anyway, back to zombie mermaids.

So, the storyline was a little confusing, and it didn't help that the movie was in japanese, but here's what I think happened. There's a wrestler and his wife really wants him to build her a house, but he never does. Then there's his explosion and his wife is admitted to the hospital with severe burns. They drug her with a mermaid drug that turns her into a fish woman. Then she ODs and becomes like.. well a zombie. So the wrestler gets himself into a bunch of debt building her a house like she wanted so that she knows he loves her. Then out of like nowhere these television producers pay for the house but they own the rights for it because it was there money, and then they tape him getting in huge deathmatch tournament for the house, while in the house.

It was pretty weird. There were a lot of weird fighting sequences and I would recommend this movie to anyone, with an odd sense of humor that is. Here is a movie poster.

Also, I couldn't get the video to upload to the site but here is a link for a movie trailer for oh my zombie mermaid. that puts me at 41 movies,. I expect progress will start getting better, movies are starting to show up in my mailbox.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vfBMTEICMgg

enjoy! And wish me luck on another undead adventure.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Okay, I'm really sorry. Zombie progress this week has been slowed because we're throwing like this huge party at my house today..... I certainly hope it doesn't turn into a zombie massacre.. I had to clean thursday and then i had to go out shopping yesterday, so I'm sorry that I've really fallen behind on that. But I have until 5 to finish getting my room picked up and then watch another one. The I'm gong to have people over, some of which will probably be spending the night, but I'll make them watch one too. I'm pretty determined to get two movies in today and at least three tomorrow to make up for being so far behind because of this party. So, wish me luck everybody, I have a lot of things to do, starting with breakfast. I was thinking maybe.... brains?

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Dealio

okay, so here's the deal. I would like to have reviews for all the zombie movies, but I find myself having not that much time to really go back and review the 38 from previous viewings individually SO, this is how we're going to deal with it.

I am going to list the movies and simply put yes or no to whether or not I would suggest it. If you having any movies you would like me to write a little more information about, email me or comment on the blog. Thanks, here you go.

28 days later yes
28 weeks later yes
American Zombie no
Army of Darkness no
Army of the Dead no
Bachelor Party in the Bungalow of the Damned of course
Beneath Still Waters not so much
Boy Eats Girl Hell Yes!
Children of the Living Dead no
Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things no
Dawn of the Living Dead yes
Dawn of the Living Dead yes again
Day of the Dead yes
Dead and Breakfast Yeah.....
The Descent It's okay
Devil's Playground no
Diary of the Dead yes
The Evil Dead have to see it, it's a classic
Flight of the Living Dead yes
I am Legend yes
Land of the Dead YES!!!
Let's Scare Jessica to Death eh....
Mulberry Street no
Night of the Living Dead classic, yeah
Night of the Living Dead ditto
Ozone not if your life depended on it
Pet Sematary yeah
Pet Sematary 2 no
Planet Terror who wouldn't want to see Rose McGowan with a machine gun as a leg?
Resident Evil no
Resident Evil: Apocalypse no
Resident Evil: Extinction still no
Resident Evil: Degeneration no again
Scooby Doo on Zombie Island YES!!!! ( so scary)
The Serpent and the Rainbow yeah
Shaun of the Dead WATCH IT NOW!!!!!
Slither How was this even a zombie movie?
Undead no
White Zombie have to see it, it's a classic
Wicked Little Things yes
Zombieland HELL YEAH!!!!

I think that's all of them.

Top 3:
Zombieland
Land of the Dead
Shaun of the Dead

Have some pics


























Review: Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things



Well, I watched the first Zombie movie specifically for the list, so yay! Unfortunately, it sucked. I mean, okay, for the time the special effects were decent but the cinematography was terrible! Even for back then. I mean, I'm watching the introduction and after that god awful music stopped I spent the next three minutes of the film trying to figure out if the people were supposed to be CGI. The faces were just that washed out. It was terrible.

The plotline.... was there really a plotline? I mean... okay, a fake ( I think it was supposed to be fake, maybe...? ) zombie voodoo spell goes wrong and people actually start rising from the dead. Right? No, not even quite that good. It was a prank,but then it was real, and then one guy wanted it to work and one girl didn't but believed it would and everyone else thought it was the same prank, then the people who were in on the original prank were scared by the fake zombies, it was hard to follow, but I'm not going to lie to you, it was even harder to pay attention to. I did not see a zombie until like, the last 15 minutes of the movie. And even then, the special effects for the prank zombie were just as decent as the real effects for the things they summoned.

The character development was poor to non-existent, they only developed one character and it was that jerk guy everybody hates. SPOILER: He dies. They all die.

I have been hearing about this Zombie classic for years, but quite honestly, unless you too are starting a list of this sort, I would not recommend it.

Opening statistics

Sorry I didn't get on yesterday, I was very busy. I went through the freebie movies on Netflix and cross referenced it with the movies on my list. So I brought back some interesting numbers for you to look at.

* First, let me tell you that I FOUND A COPY OF OH MY ZOMBIE MERMAID!!!!! And you all thought it couldn't be done.

Now that that's over with.....let me give you some numbers.
* There are 560 zombie movies on my list
* I haven't watched any new zombie movies for this project. I have seen 38 zombie films, which rounds up to 7% ( from 6.7857143 )
*I have access to 340 zombie movies ( these count ones I own, can borrow, have borrowed, are in my netflix queue or are free on netflix.) This is about 60 %

I have a lot of work ahead of me, lots of movies to watch, even more to track down, and a lot of reviews to write but let me assure you, I feel up to the task. Wish me luck, I am about to watch the first movie that's officially for this project. Special thanks to Abe ( yes, I really am calling you that ) for lending me copies of both "Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things" and "Let Sleeping Corpses Lie". I will probably have them back to you before you ever even read this, maybe even tomorrow.

If I can I'll be on later with a review for one, or both of the movies and if not I'll log on tomorrow.

Bye for now, I'll be back.
( lol for those of you that have seen Scream )
Cat.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Introduction

I used t be just your average horror movie enthusiast, but today, I set upon a great quest. (Today, let it be documented is February 1, 2010.)

So today at school an acquaintance of mine (who I shall call Abe until getting further permission to use his real name on this blog ) came in with a list he got off wikipedia of all the zombie movies ever made. While most people would see this as nothing more than a waste of paper, I saw it as a challenge. Now Abe's goal was to one day have seen every movie on that list and own them all. My goal is simple: To have seen them all by the end of the year. By February 1st 2011, I am determined to have seen all of the movies on the list (bestowed to you by the link from the previous entry.) ( I would also like to note that I was promised a trophy if I manage to pull this off one of little business men kind but with a limb chopped off.)

So I set up this blog with the sole purpose to document my experience over this next year, My Year Among the Undead if you will. I walked into that class today thinking I'd seen my fair share of Zombie movies. It is my goal now to see everyone's fair share of zombie movies.

Keep checking in, I'll probable be on a lot with zombie news, movie reviews, posters ( as an extra I'll try to post pics of movie posters from all of them ) and other things to describe to you my progress.

Wish me luck, for I am about to travel into the land of the living dead.

The List

Click this link to view the list


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_zombie_films